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Thanks to a cookie, I'm paranoid as hell.
The other night I recieved a fortune cookie that's got me on the edge. That dangerous "bad fortune cookie vibe" kinda edge.
The cookie turned out to have 2 fortunes in it. The first one simply read:
"Your dearest wish will come true."
Good enough. Positive reinforcement in the pathetic hell that is my life. Maybe the tides of fortune were flowing my way. That is, until I found the second fortune stuck to the first...
"Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst."
What the fuck? No fair. I wanna refund! here I am, top o' the world, only to have my dreams of eternal love, peace and free cable shattered by some bitter fortune cookie writer who was taking it out on me for getting a pink slip that day.
I was totally unprepared for this. I mean, eating funky chinese food I'm normally prepared for other crisis, but not that in a folded form. Who can I complain to about this? Is there a board of fortune cookie control? Should I seek out the services of a psychic to see if this cookie has really robbed my account at the Kharma Bank?
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